How do you know if he is the one?”

I would assume that there would be two general types of reaction to this question.  One of cluelessness similar to my reaction, and the other would be of having an image of a particular special someone.

To be honest, I am somewhere in the vast middle of those two reactions at this point in my life.  I am somehow clueless on how I would tell if the guy is “the” one and yet, in the recesses of my mind, there is an identity creeping in, whom I do hope would be “the” one for me.

Which brings me to writing this article – for I know that like me, there are many of you young ladies out there who are searching,  waiting, wondering and swimming in confusion, asking for confirmation.

Suffice it to say, I am no expert.  In fact, I’ve been a failure many times in the love and relationship department, but I have been burdened with this subject for months now so I’d like to share what I’ve gathered and, of course, taken from God’s Word.

I’ve summarized it all down to just two basic but fundamental factors, upon which I believe all other things rest upon:

  1. He Serves The King

Your man should, more than anything else, share the same faith.  After all your, relationship must begin with a solid and unshakeable foundation, lest it all falls apart.  Once this has been established, the man will have his plans aligned with God’s will.  He will lead his (and your) life in accordance to God’s Word.  Your man will be someone you will joyfully submit to and support as this is also God’s will.

Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?
2 Corinthians 6:14

As a result, he will be someone who loves, respects and obeys God, seeks His Kingdom and His righteousness more than anything else.  He serves God and gives his best in everything he does.

Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men.
Colossians 3:23

Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable,always abounding in the work of the Lord,knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain.
1 Corinthians 15: 58

A man who serves the LORD is the man who will serve and regard his woman as a queen, also giving her his best, just as Christ loves His church.

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,
Ephesians 5:25

  1. He is stable and set in his ways.

Your man must be stable in all aspects of his life for he will be the pillar and leader in your relationship and eventually, your family.  Whether he is just starting out in his career, goals and aspirations, his plans and direction must always be aligned with God’s.

He must lead you and your family towards that righteousness that he seeks with the Lord.

He will step up to provide for the family.  He will step up for integrity and honor.   He will step up and be the pastor and leader of his home.   A man who steps-up will also be the one to catch you when you fall.

But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God.
1 Corinthians 11:3

For even when we were with you, we would give you this command: If anyone is not willing to work, let him not eat.
2 Thessalonians 3:10

The world has made love, relationships and qualifying a husband complicated – it really isn’t!  Not in God’s terms.  It may seem like the search for the proverbial needle in a haystack, but by God’s grace, He will send you someone – in His perfect time, in His perfect way.  So we don’t need to consult an expert on love and relationships.  All we need is to do is refer to God’s Word and be discerning.

When God speaks to your man’s heart, he won’t know what hit him!   So ladies, keep hoping, keep trusting, keep praying.   In the meantime, prepare yourself to also be “the” right one. How?  Watch out for part 2 of this article entitled: “Is She The One?”