ON THE EDGE OF FAITH
People often blame their circumstances, but I choose not to believe them. I love overcoming the things that hinder me from being successful – it strengthens my character and it brings out the soldier in me to enable me to face my fears. It allows me to believe in a faithful God to do the impossible.
During my senior year in high school, our family went through the toughest time of our lives. Dad got sick and my sister stopped schooling. I was a graduating student at that time, but because of the lack of means to provide for some projects, my grades went down and I no longer held my position as an honor student. The situation was so dire that I needed to finish all my work in school before coming home because we didn’t have electricity for three months. There was even a time that I collected candles from a school activity just so I could use them to study with light at home. When I ran out of candles, I would read and study my lessons under the lamp post in the street. Despite all of these events in my life, I still I graduated as one of the top twelve students in our batch.
I tried going to a convent to get a free education with the nuns. I was really desperate to go to college even it would cost me serving inside the convent my whole life. Relatives from both sides of my family weren’t able to graduate from College except for my parents. For this reason, I would do whatever it takes to graduate, regardless of the course.
I dreamed of being a Political Science or an Economics major in the State University, but I wasn’t able to take the entrance exam because my mom needed to use our money to buy food at that time. I cried out to my parents because of the frustration I felt. My father told me that he has no money to send me to school and he can only provide for our food. I then asked my friends to help me get into college, and who were kind enough to sponsor my exam at another University, and even threw in additional funds for my transportation.
By God’s grace, I passed and was able to get into College. During my years there, I would hide inside the library during breaks. I didn’t want to hang out with my classmates because I didn’t have the money to eat with them. Finances were so scarce that I would even walk with broken shoes (almost barefoot). I endured these hardships thinking that I would be rewarded in the end.
During my sophomore year, I became a Buddhist scholar. I had to bow down to Buddha and even study Buddhist theology as a requirement of my contract. I was not comfortable doing the things I did but I had to. My parents told me that this was the only way for me to go to stay in school and achieve my dreams. I really had a tough time battling with the beliefs and philosophies of Buddhism. My dad told me to just accept the conditions, respect them and be thankful with the help they’re giving me. I obeyed my parents and completed that year.
I came to know Christ and began to have a relationship with Him during my junior year. God gave me the courage of giving up my Buddhist scholarship, determined to accept whatever punishment I was going to face.
But God blessed with me another scholarship. The local church where I found my home took me as part of their foundation. Through this scholarship I gained self-confidence because we were thought about leadership, integrity, faith and excellence. I also became the Vice President External of ministry in our campus.
My faith in Christ became stronger when I became part of a discipleship group. I learned more about Jesus and my relationship with Him grew deeper.
I finally graduated with the degree of BS Biology and now an alumna of the church’s foundation.
I thank God everyday for all the people who invested time, money and emotional support in my life. God has continued to prove His faithfulness in my life as I am now working as the bread winner of my family, as well as providing for my brother’s education.
As I grew in Christ, I learned to love His people beyond my ability. I am currently an active member, leader and a volunteer campus missionary in our church. I also have the heart for missions and encouraging people to also go and make Jesus known to the nations. I want to share how God changed my life. I also coached my siblings with all the things God has taught me.
I believed that everything that happened in my life has a purpose and that is for me to see how amazing and how great God is.
I have learned to live by faith.
In this life, I know that I can only be the best person if I am with God. And that can only happen if I would continue to step out of my comfort zone and trust Him always. I know in my heart that God will use me in changing the world. My heart is to walk in the place where no one walked before and leave a legacy in this world.
If it would take me to undergo hardships in life just to testify how faithful and good God is, then I’m willing to start embracing my fears and conquer all storms that will pass my life. I am willing to live on the edge of my faith just to live for God. There’s left to fear for my God who has secured me and eternity with Him!
“Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.” Nehemiah 8:10